Harness the fire in your belly for success

Have you ever had that stomach-churning, knee-knocking fear before a presentation or before playing a game in front of a crowd? It is not fear, no, but fire in the belly. If it is not contained, it can destroy. But, without it, there is no take-off.

No one can carry you over that fire. You have to walk through it. Your mind has to be in it. Blame someone else for your plight, you burn to ashes; blame yourself, you evaporate. Self-belief is what carries you through.

Contrary to popular opinion, self-belief is not something that you buy from a psychologist. It is not something that we receive from our parents, either. It is often said that you can blame your parents for your first childhood, but you only have yourself to blame for your second. Imagine a 40-year-old blaming his parents for his mistakes. It is a gross dereliction of duty. After a while, you grow up and parent yourself.

Many people can help – teachers, mentors, coaches – but only the person in the mirror can make you reach the greatness you desire.

The foundation of self-belief is self-knowledge. You need to know the limits of your abilities, work hard on your strengths and outsource your weaknesses by finding partners who can cover your weaknesses well.

Doubt tends to disappear when you are adequately prepared – not always, but most of the time. When you know the basics of your craft, focus on doing the right things right, not on the results. Don’t waste time by searching for the quick and easy wins.

Nothing tests self-belief more than setbacks … You try and try again, and every time you do, misfortune strikes back with equal but opposing force. It is as normal as a cold front in spring – upsetting but perfectly regular. Then you need a magic formula: just try again.

When your desired results do not happen in the time that you have allocated, keep a cool head or you will be frustrated and add more pressure to yourself, which is like fuelling a bottled fire. Things will then definitely explode out of control.

Life is full of paradoxes. You will never get anywhere when you do not work hard, but, conversely, hard work alone is no guarantee that you will succeed. You must love the pain, and endure the boredom that comes from doing the same thing over and over again. Pain is the barrier that separates the good from the great.

Patience is painful, which is why so many people cannot tolerate it. It is about accommodating other people’s shortcomings and, even worse, it is about accepting your own shortcomings, which tacitly means accepting that you may not be as good as you think you are.

I often hear young people say they have accepted that they are not people who work well early in the morning.

“I struggle to wake up … I operate better in the evenings.”

I often reply that they must then accept that they are not going to be the people who will have lots of success because only bars and nightclubs are open at night – businesses are closed and the hungry are resting to pounce before first light.

As the saying goes, “the early bird catches the worm”, but the worm that rises even earlier lives long enough to become the butterfly.

So don’t be afraid to go to the places where you will be told no. When that fear strikes your knees and the fire burns inside you, get cooking.

*Kuzwayo is the founder of Ignitive, an advertising agency.