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IT'S nearly financial year-end for most of government's state-owned enterprises (SOEs).
Isn't it time that taxpayers held an awards night for South Africa's best and worst run parastatals?
The best performing SOEs would get a bottle or two of that new Johnny Walker Platinum.
And bragging rights. Or scrolls like kids in high school, that can be worn on the fancy black suits these high-powered leaders like to wear to parliament. Those scrolls could be worn as badges of honour.
If you do a great job like make an actual profit, you get honourary colours - little golden scrolls. If you break even, you get half colours.
If you make a loss, the badge gets ripped off in public.
The awards could take place somewhere like Greenmarket Square in Cape Town or Church Square in Pretoria.
The leadership of the worst-performing parastatals could be placed in stocks and pelted with rotten tomatoes by taxpayers that have had to provide bailout money - yet again. The media would be there merrily snapping away.
The auditor general could be called in to determine if the tomotoes were deployed effectively, and the public protector would be called in by opposition parties to determine if the tender for tomatoes was above board. Fun.
This year's honours and tomotoes list may read something like this:
Gold scroll winners
Transnet would probably be the dux student in the SOE game. Under the leadership of Brian Molefe, the rail giant is going from strength to strength.
There are naturally some niggles, but how does anyone disagree with a revenue rise of 21% (in 2012) to R46bn and earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation and amortisation increasing 20% to about R19bn? It also created nearly 8 500 jobs last year.
The airports company of South Africa (Acsa) does its work mostly under the radar. While it gets a bad rep for the high tariffs and taxes it charges airlines, its airports are the best in Africa and among the best in the world.
It has turned the corner on a difficult period - including a loss-making year - to become profitable once more.
The half colour brigade
Eskom made enormous profits last year but has received huge tariff hikes of an average 25% over the past three years, so many are itching to throw a tomato or two.
Regardless, the entity has managed to keep the lights on in South Africa under increasingly difficult conditions. Eskom should be commended for doing that.
Let's be honest, no one wants e-tolls. But the South African National Roads Agency (Sanral) says it needs them. That's the bad side.
The good side to Sanral is the state of the roads it manages, about 2 5000 km out of South Africa's 600 000-odd km of roads.
It's very difficult to find a road Sanral looks after that has a pothole in it. The company does good work. I just wish it wasn't going to pay that Austrian firm so much money to collect my toll fees.
Bring on the tomatoes
The SABC is still showing episodes of MacGyver. I love MacGyver, but really... The SABC board is dysfunctional to such an extent that the chair and the deputy chair have now offered their resignations to President Jacob Zuma.
The executive has no chief financial officer (suspended) and acting head of operations. Last year the SABC made a profit of around R340m after two years of combined losses of about R600m.
Looking closer though, you find that the profit was made by cutting on programming purchases - kind of its core business. That's why we see MacGyver reruns, there aren't enough new programmes. The SABC is further expected (by Treasury) to report losses over the next three years.
Embattled state airline South African Airways (SAA) is headed for another loss this year, following losses last year. The airline has over the past 10 years seen about R12bn in capital wiped off its balance sheet.
It has no CEO and the acting CEO it had, has been suspended. It is facing an oil price it has no control over. The only thing it really has going for it right now is shareholder support.
The government has around 300 SOEs, most of them really tiny. Bigger ones like the Passenger Rail Agency of South Africa, Sentech and even Telkom are also worth considering - perhaps for our next honours and tomatoes list.
- Fin24
*Follow James-Brent Styan on Twitter at @jamesstyan. Views expressed are his own.
Isn't it time that taxpayers held an awards night for South Africa's best and worst run parastatals?
The best performing SOEs would get a bottle or two of that new Johnny Walker Platinum.
And bragging rights. Or scrolls like kids in high school, that can be worn on the fancy black suits these high-powered leaders like to wear to parliament. Those scrolls could be worn as badges of honour.
If you do a great job like make an actual profit, you get honourary colours - little golden scrolls. If you break even, you get half colours.
If you make a loss, the badge gets ripped off in public.
The awards could take place somewhere like Greenmarket Square in Cape Town or Church Square in Pretoria.
The leadership of the worst-performing parastatals could be placed in stocks and pelted with rotten tomatoes by taxpayers that have had to provide bailout money - yet again. The media would be there merrily snapping away.
The auditor general could be called in to determine if the tomotoes were deployed effectively, and the public protector would be called in by opposition parties to determine if the tender for tomatoes was above board. Fun.
This year's honours and tomotoes list may read something like this:
Gold scroll winners
Transnet would probably be the dux student in the SOE game. Under the leadership of Brian Molefe, the rail giant is going from strength to strength.
There are naturally some niggles, but how does anyone disagree with a revenue rise of 21% (in 2012) to R46bn and earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation and amortisation increasing 20% to about R19bn? It also created nearly 8 500 jobs last year.
The airports company of South Africa (Acsa) does its work mostly under the radar. While it gets a bad rep for the high tariffs and taxes it charges airlines, its airports are the best in Africa and among the best in the world.
It has turned the corner on a difficult period - including a loss-making year - to become profitable once more.
The half colour brigade
Eskom made enormous profits last year but has received huge tariff hikes of an average 25% over the past three years, so many are itching to throw a tomato or two.
Regardless, the entity has managed to keep the lights on in South Africa under increasingly difficult conditions. Eskom should be commended for doing that.
Let's be honest, no one wants e-tolls. But the South African National Roads Agency (Sanral) says it needs them. That's the bad side.
The good side to Sanral is the state of the roads it manages, about 2 5000 km out of South Africa's 600 000-odd km of roads.
It's very difficult to find a road Sanral looks after that has a pothole in it. The company does good work. I just wish it wasn't going to pay that Austrian firm so much money to collect my toll fees.
Bring on the tomatoes
The SABC is still showing episodes of MacGyver. I love MacGyver, but really... The SABC board is dysfunctional to such an extent that the chair and the deputy chair have now offered their resignations to President Jacob Zuma.
The executive has no chief financial officer (suspended) and acting head of operations. Last year the SABC made a profit of around R340m after two years of combined losses of about R600m.
Looking closer though, you find that the profit was made by cutting on programming purchases - kind of its core business. That's why we see MacGyver reruns, there aren't enough new programmes. The SABC is further expected (by Treasury) to report losses over the next three years.
Embattled state airline South African Airways (SAA) is headed for another loss this year, following losses last year. The airline has over the past 10 years seen about R12bn in capital wiped off its balance sheet.
It has no CEO and the acting CEO it had, has been suspended. It is facing an oil price it has no control over. The only thing it really has going for it right now is shareholder support.
The government has around 300 SOEs, most of them really tiny. Bigger ones like the Passenger Rail Agency of South Africa, Sentech and even Telkom are also worth considering - perhaps for our next honours and tomatoes list.
- Fin24
*Follow James-Brent Styan on Twitter at @jamesstyan. Views expressed are his own.
