Share

Tech troubles

THE centre cannot hold.

Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world…

Well, that’s what it feels like, anyway. In the midst of a work and personal crisis crunch so stiff that by itself it would have challenged me, I have had to deal with some tech issues. I am beginning to feel like an insane spider, crouched within a cobweb in which is trapped the packaging and cables and instructions that have accreted over the last few days.

Here’s the thing: my cellphone went belly-up. No, nothing was wrong with it – except for its problem with phantom data. Apparently this particular Nokia model has memory problems.

I kept it alive for several months by following advice I found on-line, to do soft and hard resets and such things, but every time I went into its rapidly decomposing memory, it would give me a hard red line and the information that – despite having virtually nothing in the memory – there was “1.3Gb of 32Gb: please remove data”. Finally, it flat-lined with the words “memory full”.

I don’t have time for this, I really don’t, so I hopped over to Game and bought me a new phone – a straightforward Samsung which can handle basic functions like calls, sms, email and pics. Only R579 – not bad for a transition phone, neh?

Except it doesn’t come with a cable to upload pics and data to my laptop. So I have to buy that as an extra, only another R299.

OK, that done, I head to two different stores searching for a new voice recorder – my faithful little Sansui has died. I need something that can handle both one-on-one interviews and recording in conference halls.

The Sansui cost me about R600, but now, the only thing I can get is R2 500. Fine, pull on the big-girl broeks, this is a working tool after all, and I can wait to buy that tablet I wanted, can’t I?

Home again, with just an hour or two of working time before the evening sets in. Let’s just check that the cellphone cable works, shall we? (Oh no, the usual struggle to open the packaging, leaving me breathless and my desk looking as though someone has been spitting up little bits of see-through plastic.)

Two guesses, friends: of course it doesn’t work. Of course it says: “Driver cannot be detected.” (You’re laughing, aren’t you? I can hear you!)

So I search for Samsung’s support number. It’s my antivirus software, I’m told, that’s blocking the upload of the driver.

“Surely not?” I exclaim. “Do you mean to tell me that every time someone buys a simple little phone like this, they have to uninstall and reinstall their virus stuff?” Apparently so.

So I phone my antivirus company’s support line (because I’ve had a change of laptop in the year-plus since I bought the package and I’m not sure I’ll be able to find my user ID and password).

Then I uninstall – plop, piece of cake, a matter of seconds. It takes about 15 minutes for the laptop to tell me two things: one, that it cannot find the Samsung driver, and two, that my driver is now ready for use. I ignore the negative message and “accentuate the positive”.

Yay! I can and do upload the test pic I took in the mall parking lot. Progress! Now to reinstall my antivirus – yearggh, that is going to take fully half an hour. But I can take a look at my new, expensive voice recorder… oh no, I have to wrestle with packaging again, and add to the heap of plastic particles cluttering my desk before I can gain access to my recorder…

…which has a ‘quick-start’ guide consisting of pictures and some numerals. I try to follow it and fail miserably. Oh no. I can go online for more help, I am told – does it ever occur to companies like Philips that some people, only a few I know, are not online?

Oh double damn, the rechargeable batteries that come with it are only partially charged – and I need this damn thing to be working tomorrow morning! I am sure I have a charger for AAA batteries…. Desperate search through the ever-growing heap of chargers, cables, and other electronic paraphernalia fails to unearth any such thing. Will have to go to shops again.

I plug the recorder into the laptop to access the manual. I am faced with a huge number of files called CS, DA, DE and other cryptic letters. I open the first one; it’s a manual, for sure, but it says 'Duležité bezpecnostní informace', so that’s no use to me.

Ah! The letters stand for languages! EN must be English! And phew! The manual tells me that I can recharge the batteries by leaving the recorder plugged into the laptop!

Ah well, I have HOURS before I get on the plane – I can forgo sleep in favour of trawling through this manual…

Pshew, mense, surely there must be a simpler way of doing things? I shouldn’t have to feel the need to employ a full-time geek.

Could those who design these things – and write their manuals – please think about the purchaser and their needs? I want function, function, function…. (Insane spider crawls off through the undergrowth of plastic, picking her eight-legged way through the cables, her eyes glittering, muttering to herself…)

 - Fin24

*Mandi Smallhorne is a versatile journalist and editor. Views expressed are her own.

We live in a world where facts and fiction get blurred
Who we choose to trust can have a profound impact on our lives. Join thousands of devoted South Africans who look to News24 to bring them news they can trust every day. As we celebrate 25 years, become a News24 subscriber as we strive to keep you informed, inspired and empowered.
Join News24 today
heading
description
username
Show Comments ()
Rand - Dollar
18.93
-0.2%
Rand - Pound
23.91
-0.1%
Rand - Euro
20.44
+0.1%
Rand - Aus dollar
12.34
+0.1%
Rand - Yen
0.13
-0.1%
Platinum
906.59
+1.1%
Palladium
1,012.66
+1.1%
Gold
2,221.01
+1.2%
Silver
24.85
+0.9%
Brent Crude
86.09
-0.2%
Top 40
68,346
+1.0%
All Share
74,536
+0.9%
Resource 10
57,251
+2.9%
Industrial 25
103,936
+0.6%
Financial 15
16,502
-0.1%
All JSE data delayed by at least 15 minutes Iress logo
Company Snapshot
Editorial feedback and complaints

Contact the public editor with feedback for our journalists, complaints, queries or suggestions about articles on News24.

LEARN MORE
Government tenders

Find public sector tender opportunities in South Africa here.

Government tenders
This portal provides access to information on all tenders made by all public sector organisations in all spheres of government.
Browse tenders